So I’m sitting in Stroz library at the beautiful Florida State University, and working on yet another attempt at starting a personal blog (via this hopefully exciting post you’re reading right now). Though I won’t pretend that my life is all that intriguing, I will say that I’ve learned a thing or two about how to do life through trial and error–emphasis on the error.
Within the last month, I both came back from a service-based trip to El Limon in the Dominican Republic and finalized plans to intern in Ollantaytambo, Peru this summer. There are so many mixed feelings stemming from both of these experiences/decisions that I can’t even begin to describe, but I’ll try at least a little.
Preparation can only get you so far. Honestly, you’ve heard this before and probably know it to be true based on personal experience, but a guidebook can only prepare you for so many things. Nothing can compare to the irrational fears that came with attempting to speak Spanish (as someone who is only proficient at a high school level) among people who considered it their primary language, or the extremely gratifying and beautiful feeling that comes with truly being present in the events that are happening around you.
I am always on my phone or laptop. Always always always. I’ll tell anyone I know that I am only on my phone to read books, but like, let’s be real. When I was abroad, I actually let my phone die! The world didn’t stop–my friends and family survived without me–and I got to reacquaint myself with myself; something I haven’t done in a long time.
It was funny how the most ‘grammable moments began to occur in the absence of our phones to capture them. The members of my trip and the community would play cards until the late hours of the night, screaming out in a strange hybrid form of Spanglish. We went dancing, and for once, I didn’t feel self-conscious as I spun and twirled in front of people I had only met a few weeks ago. I screamed until my lungs were hoarse as we drove down the highway to the beach in the back of a truck bed. Not for a Snapchat, or a video, but because I could, and because I was happy.
Haz mas. Do more. Find that happiness.